A ‘holiday’ with a toddler. Ha! There is so much irony in that title. A ‘holiday’ with a toddler.
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Who are we trying to kid. There is no such thing.
Well, unless your holidays prior to children involved going to playgrounds, getting up at 6am, building sand castles, having dinner at 6pm and going to bed before 11pm. Oh, and having the whitest palms in history, after constant factor 50 applications.
The thing is, at home our little man goes to nursery. To go on ‘holiday’, we remove him from nursery therefore, putting him in our company 24hrs a day. I LOVE having him around, but I wouldn’t call it a ‘holiday’.
These are a couple of fundamental differences holidaying with a toddler to your pre-children holidays:
1)You don’t get a suntan
Costa Del Sol here we come! Well pack the St Tropez as you won’t be lying on a sun bed catching any rays. If your child still naps you will have happy hour to go for the burn each day, but if they don’t, you are screwed. Actually to be honest you might as well just head to Scotland.
2) You will be asleep before midnight Long days drinking on the beach which then last into the early hours. Um, no no no.
The combination of the sea air, a sweaty toddler, constant sun cream applying and the knowledge that you will be watching Peppa Pig in Spanish at 6am takes it out of you.
3) There are no ‘lie in’s’
The little ones are excited. That hours time difference is playing havoc and they want to be up even earlier than normal. A holiday for them means really making the most of the days! Oh and not forgetting that they will be going to bed later than normal, which normally means they will wake up even earlier.
Because that is how they work.
4) Beach time is a sandy mess!
If you are more of a ‘sit in a beach bar with a sangria type of girl’ or one to splash out on a sun lounger, you can forget it.
Be prepared to get down and dirty in the sand. Oh and be prepared to find it in bags, body crevasses and items of clothing weeks later.
5) You won’t even make it to page 12 of your holiday read
Jackie Colins my holiday friend. I am sorry, you staying on the shelf this year. There is no space for you between the Mr Men books and Spiderman magazines
6) The holiday purchases are no longer for you
Remember when you would come home with some awesome holiday finds. That authentic Zara dress (cause it’s actually from Spain) is now replaced with jumpers for the toddler. Let’s face it, they are always better dressed than us anyway.
7) You will visit a zoo or an aquarium
Not something that would have been high on my ‘must do’ whilst on holiday list pre-children. However, the discovery of a good zoo is a holiday bonus when abroad with a toddler. You never know who you might meet…
8) You will squeeze in your cocktails whilst watching Peppa Pig on the ipad
Who said a rum based Banana Dream at one o’clock in the afternoon, can’t be enjoyed whilst watching Peppa Pig. It can. I promise
Well there it is – the truth.
Right well we had better start looking for cheap flights for next year.
This time though, I am calling it our annual ‘trip’ not ‘holiday’!